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Fuck This Shit! Fuck this shit. This is a phrase I mutter to myself more than any other word combination in the English language. Close behind are, “cock sucking monkey fuck” and “it’s all about the Benjamin’s”. At present, I am completely burnt out with school and everything related to it, except the financial aid checks. I have been going non stop since January. In that time I have taken 11 classes (at a school that is on the semester system) and on top of that I have taken a 2 year math sequence in one year….and I fucking hate math. Sometimes when I wake up all I can think of is fuck this shit! Fuck getting up. Fuck taking a shower. Fuck eating Cheerios and watching 12 minutes of the news. Fuck battling the stupid junior high kids jaywalking, stopping traffic as they walk slowly across the street as if no one has the balls to run their little asses over. Fuck the 5 mile drive that takes 25 minutes due to fact that there are only 5 routes in and out of this shit hole of a city. Fuck the fact that I want to stop at McDonalds but can't afford it. Fuck the traffic light that only allows 3 cars to turn left. Fuck the parking lot at my school and the fact that there is no reserved space for me. Fuck the fact that I have to take honors English at 8:00 in the god damn morning with some prick that graduated from Oxford. Fuck in-class essays on bullshit topics no one cares about. Fuck the Handmaids Tale and Margaret Atwood. You feminist cunt. Fuck the research paper that I have had all semester to start but have chosen not to, leaving me to pull 10 pages on the New World Order conspiracy out of my ass. Fuck the stupid little art deco squeaky chair/desks and trendy track lighting in the class room. $256 million worth of renovation and this is the best you can do? Fuck you! Fuck Statistics and the stupid gay fuck next to me that thinks I am “checking him out” every time I look in the window to see if my seat is taken. Look at me one more time bitch and you will be sucking cock through the hole in the side of your neck that I will open with my penis while I am cranially raping you (scratch that he might enjoy it). Fuck the construction that is taking place 20 feet from the building, drowning out the teacher as she makes no sense whatsoever (although I do enjoy the fact that the large machinery vibrates my balls and anus as it moves the earth). Fuck the smart Asian students that get perfect scores on their math tests while I’m still trying to figure out what the fuck a chi-square is. Fuck the jock that sits next to me and expects me to explain everything to him. I don’t know what the hell H sub 0 is you fuck, ask someone else. Fuck dragging my ass out of bed, refraining from killing the junior high school kids, and battling the stoplight from hell to make it to class on time only to be told that today is “homework day” in which we will sit quietly and do our homework. You mean I could be at home sleeping bitch? Fuck you! Fuck that half hour between stats and biology in which I purchase Doritos and walk around aimlessly. I know, I’ll check the board to see if the key to the last bio test is up. Fuck no! Ever since I challenged the teachers intelligence and told her she was wrong she refused to post the key. Fuck her! Fuck all the cool kids that hang out in front of the astronomy building and look at me as I walk by. Don’t look at me. Don’t sex me up with your eyes. I am a human being, not a piece of meat. Fuck you. Fuck biology class. The only thing I like about this class is that I get to catch up on my sleep. No one gives a shit about the difference between mitosis and meiosis. Fuck algae and medicinal leeches. Fuck sea cucumbers, air bladders and blood cells. Who gives a shit about photosynthesis, RNA or osmosis? Fuck that shit. Fuck the tests that I never study for. Thank god the Psychobiology class I took counts as my second bio requirement. One more semester of this bullshit and someone is getting knocked the fuck out. Which brings us to music class. Fuck music class. Fuck the circle of fifths, quarter notes, half notes, diatonic and chromatic intervals and enharmonic notes. Fuck major triads and the god damn dominant seventh chord. And fuck inversions. I hate inversions more than I hate biology. Fuck the 3 concert reports I’ve had all semester to do but have chosen not to. Fuck the musical composition I have to write for my honors credit. And fuck that same jock from my stats class that wants to copy my worksheets (although last time he copied them he caught many errors for me, but fuck him anyways). Fuck the fact that I have to go to work right after school. Fuck the fact that I work at the school so I am there all fucking day. Fuck helping students and doing mindless paperwork. Fuck sitting there with my thumb up my ass when my boss doesn’t unlock the file cabinet. Fuck the fact that my school has no god damn cafeteria. This one really pisses me the fuck off. It seems that the president of the school thought it was a good idea to close down the cafeteria and let the new culinary arts class sell crappy food for way too much money. $3.50 for a half a sandwich made by ex-convicts that think they are chefs because they worked in the kitchen in jail? Fuck that. Fuck my self righteous stubborn principles. Fuck the vending machine guy that always fills the soda machine at 11:30 ensuring that I get a warm soda with my lunch. Fuck the change machine that only gives golden dollars and the soda machine that doesn’t take them. Fuck all the people that get in my way and refuse to bow to me. Fuck the fact that I have to spend 8 ½ hours at school and then come home and do homework for another 5 hours. That’s bullshit. Fuck my website for being the perfect tool of procrastination and fuck you for reading this shit to motivate me to write more. You ought to be ashamed of yourself you god damn piece of shit. Fuck the fact that I am constantly broke. Fuck the fact that I have no girlfriend. And fuck this bullshit article. -= Bagoda =- |