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Looks Like Someone Just Got iPhucked
Well, it appears as though Apple fan boys have been forcibly thrown from their
white, plastic, high horses by a freak spin of the
corporate wheel. Honestly, did no one see this coming? Early iPhone customers say they are mad because they were
betrayed by an unforeseen price drop by their omnipotent overlords. This may be true, but I doubt they are mad about the money.
I mean, anyone who could afford to fork over $600 for a telephone
obviously uses $100 bills to wipe the recycled caviar and Condor egg omelets
from their pristine virgin assholes. To such a superior being, that is but a drop in the bucket.
Either that or they're dumber than a sack of rocks. The jury is
still out on that one.
No, I’m betting that these folks are mad because they are no longer the select few individuals “honored” enough to own the
status symbol of their fucked up generation. The realization that
those 5 days spent in line, sleeping on the sidewalk, in the cold,
for a god damn phone, meant little more than an easy late night
grope fest for the local indigent population is not an easy pill to
swallow. Nor is the fact that people with a third of the cash can
now walk right in to an Apple store and forego the sidewalk
molestation and be instantly in the throws of high society. Who’s the bitch now?
Who would have ever thought that the most sought after consumer electronic device on the market would debut
at an outrageously high price and drop dramatically?
Boy, I never saw that one coming. Apparently neither did this happy fellow.
If this is the new trend in consumer electronics, then I want in on the action. Although I don’t have any “hip” gadgets, I do
have some electronics that I have clearly paid way too much for. I have decided to write a letter to the Nintendo Corporation
demanding a refund for the outrageous amount of money I paid for one of their products.
I can hardly wait for my check to come. Oh man, I can buy all kinds
of hot new gadgets and send more letters demanding money once they
have depreciated. Fuck school, I’m going to be a full time corporate
whiner. I can make some serious cash. Why the hell didn't I think of
this before? I have wasted my entire life. I want to thank Apple for
simultaneously giving my life a new purpose and completely
destroying 750,000 morons. This is not an easy feat to accomplish
but, like the over priced crap the company peddles, they did it in
style. Fuckin' A.
-= Bagoda =-
Originally Posted - 9/12/07
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