Writing is for Losers and People Who Can't Make Blank Pages

Writing is for Losers
and
People Who Can't Make Blank Pages

Well boys and girls, today I’d like to share with you something very interesting I have learned about being a writer. Apparently, to be a respected writer, you don’t even have to write. I know this may come as a shock to some but rest assured I am telling the truth. A few days ago I posted a blank page and titled it “Feminist Humor”. A lame joke I know but it was something I’ve wanted to do for a while. I don’t know why. I’m crazy like that. So what you say? Exactly.

Anyways, as of this writing, that blank page has become the most viewed page on my site. As a writer, I can’t tell if that’s depressing or just plain awesome. For now I will consider it awesome as I consider myself awesome and thereby anything I do is awesome, even if it’s depressing. Sometimes on dating websites I will describe myself as depressingly awesome and get many responses from women who describe themselves as tragically beautiful. I have come to learn that all that really means is "fat with a pretty face". Anyways, what was I talking about? Oh yeah. Fuck LOL cats.

Below is a statistical breakdown of my traffic with legitimate writing versus my traffic to a blank page.

So, as you can see, writing is for losers and people who can't make blank pages. I'm going to give up writing and become the text equivalent of YTMND (seriously, what the hell is up with that site?). Blank pages in the works are pedophile humor, feminist humor 2, and the complete unabridged list of intelligent George Bush quotes. I wish I would have known this shit before I started writing like a douche bag. Live and learn.

P.S. - Everyone on the internet is fucking crazy (except me)...seriously.

-= Bagoda =-

Originally Posted - 11/16/07